Relationships – Melissa Schlies

One Surprising Step in Finding Contentment

“So, is it possible to get to the point where I am ok being single?” Over the tops of our Starbucks coffees, she looked me straight in the eye and I couldn’t lie to her. Not that I wanted to. It’s just, as a mentor whose job it is to encourage, it can be difficult to speak the truth when it’s discouraging. “It may be. But it’s also possible you will always want a relationship until you have one. I know for me, as hard as I tried, the wanting never went away.” I replied, hoping my words didn’t sound [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2021-10-11T01:28:56+00:00October 11th, 2021|Categories: Acceptance, Contentment, Habit Making, Health, perseverance, Relationships, Self Care, Singleness, Waiting|Comments Off

Creating Routines With Your Spouse Step 5: Repeat

I am a person of habit. I will drink my coffee the same way for months or years on end before changing it. When we go to our favorite sushi place, I always get their Thai rice noodles. When I listen to music, I’ll listen to the same album over and over before moving on to another. For example, this year, I listened to Taylor Swift’s new albums way more than I want you to know. In other words, If I find something I like, I’ll stick with it until it gets old. As much as I love hiking mountains [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2021-07-25T23:39:11+00:00July 26th, 2021|Categories: Balance, Change, Habit Making, Health, Marriage, Relationships, Routines|Comments Off

Creating Routines With Your Spouse Step 4: Keep Talking

Before he ever told me he loved me, Tony showed me. About four months into our relationship, we went to Maine. We traveled with a group of friends to the northern part of the state to hike Mt. Katahdin. It would be the first mountain I had ever climbed, and the morning of the hike, I began to worry I wouldn’t reach the top. Thankfully, there were plenty of other newbie climbers in our group and they assured me, we’d take breaks when we needed them. The weather was perfect and slowly but surely, we made it to the peak. [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2021-07-18T22:40:46+00:00July 19th, 2021|Categories: Adulting, Balance, Change, Habit Making, Marriage, perseverance, Relationships, Routines|Comments Off

Three Simple Routines to Grow Your Marriage

In a season in our marriage where life felt like it was closing in, Tony and I decided to take up tennis. He pulled his old racquet out of the closet. We picked up a pink handled one for me at the local sporting goods store. We bought a few canisters of tennis balls, then off we went to the local park. When he sent the ball back my way, I hit it and we both watched as it went flying up into the air, and over the large chainlink fence that surrounded the court. It was either late spring [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2021-07-11T13:29:14+00:00July 12th, 2021|Categories: Balance, discipline, Habit Making, Marriage, Relationships, Routines|Comments Off

Creating Routines As A Couple Step 2: Reevaluate

If you’ve ever been rear-ended in a car accident, chances are your neck was forced in one direction, and then quickly pulled back toward the other. This is known as whiplash. The term is defined as, “An abrupt snapping motion or change of direction resembling the lash of a whip,” (hence the name). Often it refers to this injury one incurs after a car accident. But after this past year, it also feels appropriate to life both in, and after, a pandemic. One year ago, our whole lives changed on a dime. Now, they’re changing again. Those of us who [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2021-06-28T00:11:54+00:00June 28th, 2021|Categories: Adulting, Balance, Change, Habit Making, Health, Marriage, Practice, Relationships, Routines, Social Distancing|Comments Off

Creating Routines With Your Spouse Step One: Name What Matters

Five years ago, I completed P90X3. Words, I never thought I’d be able to say, let alone write. For those of you who aren’t familiar with the program, it is an intense at-home workout regimen that has you using muscles you never thought you had. It also requires you to workout six days a week for ninety days straight. As someone who spent most of her life without a weekly workout routine at all, this accomplishment still feels like nothing short of a miracle. The fact that I was able to commit to such a physically demanding daily routine is [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2021-06-14T00:30:00+00:00June 14th, 2021|Categories: Habit Making, Marriage, Preparation, Purpose, Relationships, Routines, Success|Comments Off

Five Reasons To (re)Build Routines in Your Marriage

Sometimes, life gets away from us. Work gets busy. Loved ones get sick. We face physical or mental illness. Worldwide pandemics happen. And in the thick of it all, it can be easy to lose sight of each other. Weeks go by and you realize you can’t remember the last time you had a conversation with your spouse that wasn’t a run down of “need to know” type things. You don’t know how long it’s been since you had a date and actually looked in each other’s eyes for longer than five minutes. Maybe, you’ve hurt one another and it’s [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2021-06-07T11:09:55+00:00June 7th, 2021|Categories: discipline, Habit Making, Health, Marriage, Relationships, Routines|Comments Off

The Real Secret To Our Marriage (repost)

As we're talking about building routines in marriage this month, I'd thought I'd re-share this post on what makes the foundation of our relationship strong--our beliefs. Naming our beliefs and values are one of the first steps in building healthy routines in marriage. Do you remember, in high school, wishing you had the answer key to a hard exam? Even though you knew cheating was wrong, there was a part of you that wished for an easier way. For me, it was always my chemistry exams—which is ironic as here we are talking about a different kind of chemistry. That [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2021-05-27T20:10:17+00:00May 31st, 2021|Categories: Faith, Friendship, Habit Making, Marriage, Relationships, Routines, Uncategorized|Comments Off

No One Prepared Us for Married Life in a Pandemic

"You don't marry someone you can live with, you marry the person you cannot live without.” — P.S. I Love You For longer than any of us have been alive, there have been movies about love. For centuries before that, there were plays. Acted out stories that have made us think and even dream about romance. Ones that have shaped the way we view relationships and marriage. Only, None of them prepared us for marriage in a pandemic. For almost eleven months, Tony and I have been working from home together. Not only that, but we’ve moved into our first [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2021-02-06T21:19:35+00:00February 8th, 2021|Categories: Adulting, Change, Conflict, Health, Hope, Marriage, perseverance, Relationships, Social Distancing|2 Comments

How to Fight Loneliness (Because It Always Comes)

When I was a kid, I thought loneliness was sitting alone at the lunch table at school. Having no one to hang out with at recess. Or that temporary feeling I’d get when my closest friend was on vacation with her family. Little did I know, there are so many kinds of lonely, and as we go through life, we feel them all. There are so many kinds of lonely, and as we go through life, we feel them all. There is the kind of loneliness that comes when we leave home and realize for the first time, we are [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2020-11-04T21:52:15+00:00November 5th, 2020|Categories: Habit Making, Lead, Learn, Loneliness, Love, Love Learn Lead, Mental Health, Relationships, Self Care, Social Distancing|Comments Off

One Surprising Step in Finding Contentment

Creating Routines With Your Spouse Step 5: Repeat

Creating Routines With Your Spouse Step 4: Keep Talking

Three Simple Routines to Grow Your Marriage

Creating Routines With Your Spouse Step One: Name What Matters

Five Reasons To (re)Build Routines in Your Marriage

The Real Secret To Our Marriage (repost)

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