One of my favorite holiday memories as a kid was on Thanksgiving. As most childhood memories go, I can’t for the life of me remember what our family’s plans were supposed to be that day. I only remember what happened. But most likely, for dinner, we were supposed to go see our grandparents, who lived over an hour away. Then,
We got a big New England snow storm.
The kind that created drifts far taller than my youngest sister. She was four or five then, and the snow banks made her cry out from not being able to see my mom a mere few feet away. As a family, we spent the morning shoveling snow and creating snow forts in our front yard. There was no way we were making it to see our grandparents, let alone having a turkey dinner.
There was no way we were making it to see our grandparents, let alone having a turkey dinner.
But then, around noon, one of my parents called the fancy, colonial style hotel not too far from our home, to see if they had any cancellations in their restaurant. Sure enough, they had had a few tables open up for that afternoon. After we shed our snow gear and cleaned up, my mom had us dress up. Then my dad carefully drove us over to the hotel for dinner.
At that point in my life, it was the fanciest meal I had ever had.
The table was set with more silverware at each place than I knew what to do with. The waiter kept refilling our ice water in a way that finally one of my sisters cried out, asking him to stop. And the food—well, it was delicious. Each of us got the most beautiful plate of turkey, mashed potatoes, and vegetables. Then of course, there was pie.
The snow storm hadn’t ruined our Thanksgiving. Instead it gave us a new experience altogether.
The snow storm hadn’t ruined our Thanksgiving. Instead it gave us a new experience altogether. One that has never been repeated. Though our Thanksgiving traditions have morphed over the years, we haven’t eaten out since. But reminiscing about this memory this past Thanksgiving, reminded me of an important lesson when it comes to the holidays:
We have to hold our plans loosely.
Every one of us, whether we admit it or not, have these picture perfect desires for the holidays—that may or may not be transparent to others or even ourselves. Fabricated from our nostalgia of the Christmas’s of our childhood, the Disney and Hallmark Channels, Pinterest and perhaps, the latest William and Sonoma catalog—we all long for a beautiful, peaceful holiday surrounded by those we love, and of course, flowing with good food.
Only, as much as Martha Stewart may have us believe, not every detail is in our control. And not every holiday gathering or party is going to go as planned. Not all the food may be the right temperature when we serve it. We may forget to buy the fancy napkins and have to use paper towels. But here is the good news:
Great holidays don’t require perfection.
If we can loosen our grip on what we believe this season and its holidays should look like, we will discover unplanned moments of brilliance. It could be an impromptu, sweet conversation with loved one. A last minute change of venue. Or even, a snow storm.
If we can loosen our grip on what we believe this season and its holidays should look like, we will discover unplanned moments of brilliance.
As a serial planner, I have to confess, holding my plans loosely can be difficult. But when my grip isn’t so tight, I am more able to let go of “my plan,” for the unexpected opportunities that come my way. Thankfully, that is exactly what my parents did all those years ago, on that snowy Thanksgiving. Not all of our best holiday memories are birthed out of the planning. Some of the greatest ones are birthed in embracing the unplanned.
Is holding your holiday plans loosely a struggle for you?
What’s the worst thing that could happen, if you let go—just a little?
Do you feel mentally and/or emotionally overloaded by both real life and the approaching Holidays? If so, sign up for my email list and get your FREE copy of my Five Steps to Declutter Your Mind, to help you find clarity and peace this season.
Photo by Brigitte Tohm on Unsplash
