Last week, Tony and I had one of our late night conversations. The ones where we say in the dark, what we didn’t say in the light to each other that day. Things hard to speak out loud, and even more difficult to hear. Yet ones needed to be said.
As I shared in April, we’ve been in a time of change these past few months. Our schedules have become very different from what they’ve been since the pandemic began. And as restrictions in our state continue to lift, our daily and weekly routines will continue to shift. This is challenging for us because,
We’re routine people.
We feel at our best, both as individuals and as a couple, when our lives are keeping to a weekly rhythm of healthy practices. Ones that strengthen us mind, body, and soul, as well as enable us to connect with each other in the midst of all the busyness. Habits that some people might say they don’t have time for, but ones we’re finding we can’t afford not to make a priority.
Marriage requires intention.
If there is anything we’ve learned during our almost eleven years of matrimony, it’s this. When two people get married, they’re choosing to build a life together. Only after the wedding, each person must continue to choose to work with their partner, or they’ll find they’ve created two separate lives. For us, building our life together looks like continuing to create, follow, and tweak a set of routines that align with what we value as a couple.
When two people get married, they’re choosing to build a life together. Only… each person must continue to choose to work with their partner, or they’ll find they’ve created two separate lives.
Daily practicing together what is important to us, has drawn us closer and built trust in our marriage. Some of these habits include praying together regularly, meal planning, and working out together a few times each week. Over the years, they’ve morphed in different seasons of our careers, healths, etc. But through it all, they’ve been tangible, doable ways for us to continue to grow together, and make the most of the life we’ve been blessed with.
Here on the blog, I’ve talked a lot about marriage and routines. But I’ve rarely ever talked about building routines in marriage. I want to create a healthy and meaningful life with my most important person, and I believe you do too. That is why, over the next few weeks we’re going to focus on what it looks like to create life giving practices with our significant others, how to maintain them, and where to start if routines is something you’ve never discussed with your spouse before.
I want to create a healthy and meaningful life with my most important person, and I believe you do too.
Writer, Annie Dillard once wrote, “How we spend our days is of course how we spend our lives.” If Tony and I didn’t thoughtfully create routines in our marriage, our life would be very different. Working together daily to follow healthy practices, has built the trust needed to communicate well. If it weren’t for being intentional in this way, there might not be any late night conversations. There wouldn’t be the “us” we want to be.
Do you practice any routines with your significant other?
In what areas do you feel new routines need to be built?
If you want more help in finding your rhythm when it comes to routines–or just a friend for this crazy journey called life–sign up for my email list today and receive two extra posts and other fun resources in your inbox every month! Sign up here and also receive my free resource on creating space in our lives for what is most important.
