A little over a month ago, I got the Winter Blues. I was tired of the grey skies, cold weather, and being inside. Only, it felt like it was more than that. Just as the winter seemed never ending, so too did a few circumstances in my life. Being inside day after day, only seemed to accentuate my situation, and I just wanted an escape.
So, I turned to beach reads.
You know, those books you’re supposed to read while you’re actually sitting in the sand, on the beach, in the sun? The ones that take place in dreamy summer destinations that are often too expensive for most of us to even visit? And—usually include some cheesy love story?
During a dark week in February, in my spare time, I confess I read three of these books—all in a row. When the characters sat on their secluded beaches contemplating their love life, I pretended I was on the beach with them, soaking in the sun. I could almost feel the warm sand beneath my feet.
But then, in the last book I picked up, there was a woman that drove me a little crazy. It wasn’t because she had this perfect family beach house to escape to when her life was in shambles, though she did. Or even that she went all Britney Spears and shaved her head. Instead, it was as she began to flashback to all the bad decisions leading to her escape, that I began to feel frustrated.
As I said, it was a beach read, so all of her decisions of course revolved around a romantic relationship. For over a year, this character had kept dating a guy even though she knew she didn’t want to be with him. She even said yes when he proposed. Until, mere months from their wedding day, she broke it off. Then, for a variety of reasons, her life went into a tailspin.
Throughout the entire book, as she detailed her relationship, I couldn’t understand why she stayed with him as long as she did. Not only was it terribly unfair to the guy, it also kept her from being true to herself. Why would a person keep choosing something other than the life they were meant to live? Than the life they wanted?
Thankfully, by the end of the book, the author kindly gives us an answer: This character thought she was doing what she was supposed to do, what everyone expected her to do. For some of us, that may seem like a lame answer. Only, how many of us have felt the weight of expectations belonging to our boss, parents, friends, or significant other when making a decision? How many of us have caved to the wants of others rather than choosing our own?
All of us have something holding us back. The question is how long are we going to allow it to have power over us?
Whether we realize it or not, we all have things that hold us back. Expectations, fears, insecurities, or bad experiences that keep us from doing the thing we know we need to do. Or, from doing the thing we want to do. All of us have something holding us back. The question is how long are we going to allow it to have power over us?
This month, in April, we are going to talk about what holds us back. I promise to share some real stories—not ones about fictional bald women escaping to their beach house. And even share some tips to get out from under the things that are holding us back.
Is there something you want to do, but you aren’t doing it?
If so, what is holding you back?
Are you in the midst of making a hard decision? Contemplating a big life change? If so, you may be interested in my FREE Making Changes Checklist that I give to all my email friends. Want your free copy? subscribe here.
Photo by S O C I A L . C U T on Unsplash
