It may surprise you to learn, I was unhappy to find myself working at a university bookstore after graduating college. As you might know, I love books. I was an English major. And, one of my favorite things to do is to wander the aisles of a bookstore with a cup of coffee in my hand. For me it’s pretty close to heaven. So why wasn’t I happy?
Well, for one, shelving text books isn’t the same as reading a fantastic novel. Retail is hard work. But more than anything, my unhappiness wasn’t about where I was, it was about where I wasn’t.
Throughout college, I had volunteered and interned in youth ministry—the field I wanted to work in—and I found it incredibly rewarding. I mentored amazing teenagers through the hard parts of high school, told them Jesus loved them, and often watched them make good life choices. Then, as an intern, I got a taste of what it would be like to do all of this full time. And honestly, I don’t think many other occupations would have compared.
After graduation, when the best job opportunity I found was working in a university bookstore, I took it. But in my heart and mind, it could never take the place of youth ministry. And I found myself in limbo. I wasn’t where I had been (college), and I wasn’t where I wanted to be. I was in this weird place in the middle.
It was like I was in a holding tank or a waiting room, only I still went home every night. Yet by living with my grandparents, home wasn’t what I was used to either. In so many ways it was an incredible gift, but it was way different from the college life I’d just left.
What do you do when life looks nothing like you planned?
Instinctually, I might have told you to fight like crazy to get where you want to be. Only sometimes, doors close and others that you expect to open wide, seem to disappear altogether. Life, or as I believe, God, takes you on a journey you couldn’t have imagined, and often, wouldn’t have planned. However, it is in these unexpected times we learn things we never would have otherwise.
Today, I want to share three things I learned in that weird middle place after college. I learned:
To look for and savor the good.
The strange thing about weird middle places is they often give us surprisingly good things we wouldn’t have had otherwise. We just need to make sure we’re not too caught up with what we don’t have that we miss them. That year working in the bookstore, I was able to live with and create wonderful memories with my grandparents. Later, I eventually moved to another state, where I would only see them once or twice a year. As my grandfather’s memory was fading, living with them was precious time I’d never get back.
Important life and leadership skills are developed best in the waiting.
In Romans chapter five, verses three and four, we are told, “Suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.” What I didn’t realize then, is perseverance and character can’t be built on the fly while we’re in our dream job. No, they are usually built while we’re working in places where no one can see us. Big dreams require the strength to keep going and doing the right thing in high pressure situations. Our weird middle places give us the opportunity to grow these skills, and prepare for the responsibilities our dreams require.
“Experience is what you get when you don’t get what you want.”
These words of Dr. Randy Pausch, from his last lecture before he died of terminal cancer, have always stuck with me. What I couldn’t see during my year in Boston, was that my job managing the text book floor of a bookstore, was preparing me to lead a ministry that was bigger than any I had ever served in. By learning how to lead a team of employees, I was learning how to lead a team of volunteer ministry partners. Though where we are may look nothing like where we want to be, it doesn’t mean we aren’t on the exact path that will take us there.
What have you learned in your weird middle places?
How have they prepared you for where you are now?
Are you in the midst of making a hard decision? Contemplating a big life change? If so, you may be interested in my FREE Making Changes Checklist that I give to all my email friends. Want your free copy? subscribe here.
