Identity – Melissa Schlies

When Everything Felt Empty, He Whispered, “This is What I’m Like”

Taking a break from our normal routine to share a few stories from trips we’ve taken—for all of us missing our usual vacations. The first time we went to the Finger Lakes in New York, they were having a drought. Tony is a gifted landscape photographer, and planned to shoot the dramatic Taughannock Falls. Only when we got there, it was only a trickle. The waterfall looked like a leaky faucet. It had all but dried up. The sight of water dripping down the side of the rock face is deeply embedded in my memory. At the time, it felt [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2020-08-31T15:59:56+00:00September 7th, 2020|Categories: Faith, Fear, gratitude, Hope, Identity, Travel|Comments Off

What if You’re a Success, & You Don’t Even Know It?

Two parts boredom and one part hope that someday soon we’ll be moving, had Tony and I cleaning out our room last weekend. And I mean, deep clean. We emptied out our closet, drawers, and my bookcase. But the treasure we found, was a lot closer to the surface. As I am terribly allergic to dust, Tony dismantled the small mountain of stuff on my dresser and dusted everything. Then I came in, wearing my COVID mask, to sort things out. But just as he was finishing, he held up a small piece of hemmed fabric that I’ve had on [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2020-05-11T13:23:45+00:00May 4th, 2020|Categories: Beauty, Calling, Creativity, Identity, Success|7 Comments

Finding Healing From Creativity

There’s this thing that happens when you make the most of a bad situation for longer than you should: once you leave, all the crappy stuff comes back to you. It doesn’t stay in the past, where you thought you left it. Instead it oozes out of you in the most inconvenient times. It weighs you down, in the very moment you’re ready to move forward. That’s exactly how I felt when I left church ministry. Just when I thought I’d made my escape, all the pain I hadn’t dealt with or even acknowledged, rose to the surface. And, as [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2020-03-19T18:24:31+00:00March 23rd, 2020|Categories: Creativity, grief, Health, Hope, Identity, Mental Health|Comments Off

The Reasons We Don’t Create

Not too long ago, on a podcast, I heard a famous chef lament over what food has become in our country. She said Pinterest and Instagram have shown us how beautiful and fancy it can be. So much so that many of us home cooks wonder why we should even try. There is beauty in feeding others. Then she went on to say that there is so much more to making a meal than cooking a piece of steak perfectly. She talked about the beauty in feeding others. About the love one feels when a hot meal is placed in [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2020-03-05T16:26:17+00:00March 9th, 2020|Categories: Creativity, discipline, Fear, Habit Making, Identity, perseverance, Practice, Rejection|Comments Off

This One Lie is Holding Us Back More Than We Think

It was progress report day, my senior year of high school. After Art, I made my way to my last class, Spanish IV. There, I sat in my usual seat, and laid my books out on my desk. But when our teacher stood up to begin his lecture, a student appeared at the door. “Mr. M, Mr. C wants to see Melissa, if it’s ok.” At this Mr. M nodded. Then looking at me, he leaned his head towards the door as if to say, ‘you may go.’ I got up from my desk. Then the student added, “He wants [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2020-03-01T12:26:59+00:00March 2nd, 2020|Categories: Anxiety, Courage, Creativity, Depression, Identity, Purpose|Comments Off

On meeting Insta Puppies & Getting Over Comparison

We had just finished our first tasting at a winery in Sonoma California. The richness of Pino Noir still lingered on my tongue, as Tony and I walked around a little shop adjacent to the tasting room. And as we debated spending more than we wanted to on a bottle of merlot, two tall, blond women walked into the shop with their very well groomed dog. A minute later, two other women came in and one quickly stooped down to pet the dog. “I hope you don’t mind me asking—but is this Fluffy*?” the woman asked the woman holding the [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2019-10-10T14:35:37+00:00October 14th, 2019|Categories: Acceptance, comparison, FOMO, Identity, Uncategorized|Comments Off

Becoming One With Room For Two

Do you remember the feeling you had when you and your spouse first fell in love? Not just the warm, fuzzy, floating on air stuff, but also the feeling that you couldn’t get enough of each other? It’s almost like taking that first bite into a perfect pizza. It is so delicious, you don’t ever want to stop eating it. Or finding a book you love so much you don’t ever want it to end. Or hitting replay on your new favorite song, believing you’ll never get tired of it. Except, you have this feeling for a person. A person [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2019-05-19T13:57:02+00:00May 20th, 2019|Categories: Balance, Freedom, Health, Identity, Marriage, perseverance, Purpose, Relationships, Uncategorized|6 Comments

Two Things Brene Brown Has Taught Me About Criticism

Growing up, there were a few circumstances that sent my family spinning into survival mode. Being the middle child, I quickly learned to cope by trying to make everyone and everything all right. Something, I couldn’t actually do. But by watching out for my younger sisters, being good, and taking care of things around the house, it seemed I was able to manage things. That somehow, for my family, I was able to lessen the blow. These skills I developed at home served me well at school too. By learning what was expected of me and performing it, I was [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2019-04-24T13:52:40+00:00April 25th, 2019|Categories: Courage, Failure, Fear, Good Books, Identity, Lead, Leadership, Learn, Love, Love Learn Lead, Rejection, Uncategorized|4 Comments

Adulting 101

When you were a kid, and people used to ask you who you wanted to be when you grew up, do you remember what you’d say? Did you say you wanted to be a fireman or a doctor? Or did you say you wanted to be a mom or a dad because your parents were just that cool? Better yet— Does any of your old answers match up with who you are today? When I was nine I remember saying I wanted to be a fashion designer. Something must have changed though, because I went on to wear mostly jeans [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2019-01-31T16:09:12+00:00February 4th, 2019|Categories: Adulting, Anxiety, Balance, Courage, Hope, Identity, Success, Uncategorized|Comments Off

No Is Not An Answer

On my journey to live out my calling, I have received a lot more no’s than yeses. I was reminded of this recently, when I started reading through one of my journals from the year after I graduated college. At the time, I was working at a bookstore in Boston, and sending my resume out to almost any youth ministry job posted online that I could find. In a journal entry from February, a full nine months after graduation, I wrote about receiving a letter from a church saying they were going with a more qualified candidate. A letter—Do you [...]

By Melissa Schlies|2018-11-12T13:33:48+00:00November 12th, 2018|Categories: Acceptance, Calling, Character, Courage, Hope, Identity, perseverance, Success, Uncategorized|Comments Off

When Everything Felt Empty, He Whispered, “This is What I’m Like”

What if You’re a Success, & You Don’t Even Know It?

Finding Healing From Creativity

The Reasons We Don’t Create

This One Lie is Holding Us Back More Than We Think

On meeting Insta Puppies & Getting Over Comparison

Becoming One With Room For Two

Two Things Brene Brown Has Taught Me About Criticism

Adulting 101

No Is Not An Answer

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