When Summer Ends

When you get married, people give you all kinds of advice. I’ve heard the same is true if you have a baby, but I wouldn’t know. I do know however that so much of the advice we received leading up to our wedding day felt like clothes we couldn’t fit into yet. Everything about our relationship was new and shiny, it was hard to imagine experiencing the scuffs and bruises that life inevitably brings. So much of what people said seemed to roll off the glow of our excitement.

Though there was one piece of advice, that still to this day, I remember. Someone said to me to try and slow down moments from our wedding day. That everything goes by in a blur, so when possible, stop and take a mental picture of the things you want to remember. The look on your spouse’s face when you meet at the altar. The first dance. The picture of having both of your families and all your loved ones together in one room at one time. In other words, moments that can never be fully recreated.

As we were warned, when our wedding day rolled around, it went by in a blur of white, red, and orange (our wedding colors). And I have to tell you, it’s kind of strange knowing that some of our guests may remember more of our wedding than we do. As bride and groom, there wasn’t a lot of time to sit back and take things in. But thanks to this advice, there are a few moments that I still carry with me.

Silly as it may seem, I was reminded of this advice recently while watching a rerun of The Office. Having never seen all of the seasons, it’s been fun to see some of the episodes now years later, for the first time.

The episode I was watching was of Jim and Pam’s wedding. When they get in the car to drive to Niagara Falls, for their destination wedding, Pam tell’s Jim that someone gave her this very same advice. To take mental pictures of their wedding day. Then, in his charming Jim way, he pretends his hands are a camera and “takes a photo” of her. This moment made me wonder,

Are there more mental pictures we need to be taking?

Somehow, we are already at the end of August. For most of us, our vacations are over and our lives are beginning to slip back into our fall routines. For some of us, it’s been a “eh” summer, so it doesn’t seem to be a big deal. But does this mean there weren’t moments this season that we shouldn’t try and hold onto? Or, that in these last few weeks before the weather turns cool, we shouldn’t try and make another memory or two? Savor a few more minutes with our loved ones?

In college, I remember friends planning their weddings—before there were even guys in the picture—as if the white dress was the end goal. Thankfully, Tony and I have always known our wedding day was just the beginning of our adventure together. But all along it has taken intentionality to celebrate and create moments—big and small—from our marriage that we’ll always carry with us. In other words,

It’s not just remembering the big days that are important.

In fact, when we were single, being intentional to create memories was just as crucial. As both of us were in our late twenties when we got together, we brought into our relationship photo books and stories from adventure and mission trips we took before we even met. Those memories enriched our lives and have been just as valuable to us, as the ones we have taken together. They have shaped who we are.

What we do with our time in between our jobs and family obligations, matter. Taking mental and actual pictures of our good moments are important. As this season ends, I want to invite you think about what you’re going to hold onto from summer 2018. And also begin to dream of the memories you want to make this fall.